Kitty Cat Photos

I took some cute photos of Lucy and Baxter:

facebook album: Lucy & Baxter

Wow! They caught OUR burglar!

We were broken into at the end of August, and figured we'd never see our stuff again.  But the Dekalb County Police apprehended our guy!  We were going to meet the detective tonight to retrieve what's left of our stuff, however he had to reschedule for tomorrow.  But we recognized some of things in this video.....  you guys thought I was kidding about the rubbermaid containers?  Both blue and gold colored ones right there... also think I saw some missing remotes, Ben's super old Mac, and a TiVo unit that was ours. ... 

here's the link to the TV News Stories

WSBTV SERIAL BURGLAR

CBS 46

Adoption Waiting

Ben and I met with our adoption counselor last week, and we have FINALLY turned in EVERY last bit of paperwork needed, as well as complied with the requested "hoops" that we were asked to jump through.  It was hard stuff to hear, but they are steps to help us have the happiest, healthiest home possible for our future baby, so it has been good in the long run.  I had hoped that we'd have our home visit before Christmas, but Bethany is waiting on some background check stuff from Maryland which might take a bit longer.  At any rate, we're ALMOST ready for that home visit and it's time to get our profile ready (again -- it was lost on the computer the burglars took!) so we're starting to see a little light for the end of the approval stage.  Once the counselor comes out for our home visit, she's supposed to have us officially approved for adoption within a month and at that point we will be officially waiting.

Waiting, of course, will be a whole new kind of experience.  It's not quite the same as being pregnant and knowing a due date, because it is a guarded anticipation.   But we'll be waiting for a birth Mom to choose our profile, then for the baby to be born, and then for the 10 day period she has to change her mind to pass.... and then, if that baby doesn't work out, waiting for it to happen all over again.  And if we happen to be chosen by a birth Mom that didn't make her adoption plan and suddenly has a baby to give up then I suppose it could all be pretty surprising and sudden.  Just never know what God will have in store for us.  Might take a few months, might take a few years.  At any rate, I'm getting excited at the anticipation of getting to a new stage of beginning our family.  And I'm going to try to leave the timing to God, as I know His plan is a perfect one, but sometimes that is easier said than done. (-:

Where did 2008 go?

HOW is 2008 already drawing to a close?  Wow, that one went super fast!  Guess we stayed busy with changing jobs, selling a house, buying a house, moving, adoption process, and a burglary.  But, gosh.   It's like I woke up after missing months of time, yet I was here for all of it!  Am I alone here?  Anyone else wondering what happened to 2008?

The Ride

When I talk about being on "The Ride", people always ask me what it is.  It's hard to sum up, but I'd say that it is an amazing small group experience, where we get to be a part of a safe community while discovering our own individual journey on our path toward a closer, more intimate relationship with God.  A place where we explore, discuss, and learn all about what "Christ in me" looks and feels like.  Where we learn about our flesh, learn to accept it for what it is, and practice loving others who are working through their own stories while we work through our own.  There is amazing, biblical, grace-filled teaching.  We have mentors to help us figure out the confusing parts.  We share a weekly meal, get to know one another, and learn to love ourselves through loving one another.  We are real, we are open, and we are vulnerable.  Yet, we are safe.  We get to be creative, even when some of us don't see ourselves as creative.  "The Ride" has changed my life.  Not just my church life, but my life.  My marriage is better, I appreciate each day more, I appreciate other people more, and I am learning not to expect too much from myself.  Life is not about what I accomplish or what I do and don't do.  Instead, I'm learning that it is a lot less work, but a lot more rewarding, to just sit back and watch God do His thing through me.  Moment by moment, decision by decision, day by day.

Reflections from The Ride

Dear God,

I offer myself to you.  Help me to be aware of my flesh, and instead choose you.  Help me to remember that my flesh is NOT me.  I am merely a battleground, except I get to pick sides.  Help me to let you live through me, moment by moment.

GAL 5: 9 The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like.

GAL 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. 

GAL 5: 7 Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. 8The one who sows to please his flesh, from that nature^[a^]will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life.

ROM6  11In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus.

How amazing is it that acts of the flesh are hard work, and not fun but allowing you to live in me is not work?  It’s a done deal and I don’t have to keep working on earning my salvation.  I became a new creation all at once, and that is that!  Help me to move away from performance based acceptance of my myself and others, and instead to know my identity in you.

God, help me see others and myself as you see us: PERFECT AND BLAMELESS.  There is no condemnation, but there is a way to live in grace.

Thanks be to God!  You rock!

New Hair

So, I went to a new hair stylist this morning. He was more expensive, but he gave me a great cut that is exactly what I wanted.  Except he was honest that he thought I'd look better with no bangs.  (I've been thinking about getting them again...)  So, here's a similar cut to the last one, but much improved!

   

Economic Politics by Jen

Ok, maybe I've been listening to Neil Bortz and Dave Ramsey too much.   But here's my current take on politics....

I know very little about politics, and generally stay away.  I generally don't even want to discuss politics.   I do enjoy listening to Neil Bortz because he is hilarious, and I find myself agreeing with him more and more.  But in my core, I am a democrat.  Ironcially, I married a Republican.  Which means politics come up more at dinner with my family than the used to.  Go figure.

I believe in the separation of church and state, yet I certainly also believe in saying personal prayers about God's hand in who becomes elected as well as praying for God's hand in the policies our government makes.  I believe it is the responsibility of the Government to take care of people, and provide helping hand programs.  I do not, however, believe in hand out programs.  I believe that workers do have rights, and that the government should protect the majority of the people out there and not the people running those companies that are all about getting rich rather than treating employees fairly.  I think health care should not be run and orchestrated by the government per se, I just think health care should not only be for privileged.  I hope and pray that one day Medicare will be available to people who are disabled when they are disabled -- and not two years later because the government wants to save a buck.  In the long run, that costs the government more.  (Duh --- let's give them monthly money benefits as long as they are sick, but not provide health care at any level for two years.  That should be cheaper in the long run.  NOT!) I think the government should play a role in economics, but I feel quite strongly that this recent bill STINKS!  You can't live in a capitalist society and expect that your own dumb mistakes and risk taking in business will be rewarded with hand outs.   And that is what congress just did.  I do think a higher insured amount for our bank accounts is excellent.  But beyond that, well, both business and investing include risk.  I've only had two economic classes in my life and I know that.   Suck it up.  This would be that risk they were talking about.  Why is risk in general well and good, and worth taking, until it effects you?  Why should risk only be for other people?!?  Hello!

Come on, America.  Take responsibility for your self, your own business, your own bad decisions.  Is it news that the strength of economies rise and fall?  Um. No.  Do you know what creates the strongest come back for so called "victims"?   The victims that refuse to see themselves as victims, that find power within themselves, and decide to look for the best in even the worst scenario.  And the victims with people who love them supporting them, but NOT bailing them out, are always better off in the long run.  Hand Outs are useless and prolong the inevitable.  Helping Hands give strength when you are down so that you can survive and become better from your experience.

Only wish our government had thought through things more and realized that.  

I work for the government, and love my job. I also believe in the Social Security system, yet agree that some serious reforms are needed for SSA. There are many times that I take a disability claim and get great satisfaction knowing that the claim I am taking is the exact scenario SSA was meant to help with. By the same token, I too often take disability claims where I am happy to know there is NO WAY this person will get approved, and I am glad there are structures in place to make sure it goes to only the people that truly qualify.

But, y'all, the government is a mess.  It's not like we have a CEO that makes a decision that gets carried out immediately.  A decision gets suggested, the congress has to vote on it, then it gets pondered and revised for a year or two, and then they have to write the policy that outlines the process with which to carry out the decision, and then they spend a year or two revising that (it must be approved at many, many layers of government), and then they have to figure out the forms that will have to be used to make sure that only the correct, intended, people will benefit from this decision.   And then they have to train whoever it is that is going to decide who is eligible how to decide who is eligible, and then, they have to have an appeal process so that if someone feels like they were wrongly disqualified they have the right to fight it.  And then, they implement that original - all be it -- slightly altered decision.  And, about that time, a new decision gets put out there because that first decision doesn't look like such a great idea once it is actually implemented.   Case in point--- the medicare prescription drug program.   Screwing old people all over the country, and prescriptions often cost more in the end - when you include the premiums and the so call doughnut void in the middle of the year-- than they used to.  Thank goodness for Wal-Mart and Kroger and $4 prescriptions!

At any rate, my humble prediction is that this "rescue" bill is going to prolong the economic crisis, create a scenario where people take more risk because they figure the government will fix the problem when it doesn't work out, and then create a cycle where government gets way, way too much power.  

CFC Campaign

So, I'm one of two "keyworkers" for the CFC Campaign at my new office.   I've never done that before, but I've always wanted to.  What's the CFC?  Combined Federal Campaign... it's a huge deal in the Federal Government workplace.  Over 2,200 nonprofit organizations are involved, and we can make a one time donation or a pay roll deduction for all 26 pay periods of the year. When I worked at the Payment Center in Baltimore, the entire building went nuts for two months straight.  Bake Sales, Hot Dogs for sale, raffles, etc all over the building.  Our email inbox was flooded with invites to random things in other "Mods" as we called the Modules we worked in.  

Aside from the fact that you promise your money before -- but in anticipation of - your annual raise, and can donate just a few dollars a pay that you will never miss, the neatest part about CFC, I think, is that you get to choose which of the charities YOU want to support.  So I get to choose Bethany (our Adoption nonprofit), Boys & Girls Club (my little buddy Jasmine spends so much of her time there and it is a great program for hard working families to have a structured, safe place for their kids after school), and Community Health Charities (a federation of nonprofits out there to help people who need an extra hand when they become ill-- dear to my heart considering the disability stories I hear everyday).  And I don't have to support all of the 2,000 charities.... especially the charities that I have fundamental issues with or that spend a good portion of their "donations" on operating costs.  Just the ones that matter to ME.

Anyway, I can NOT believe the generosity our first TWO days of our Gwinnett SSA Campaign brought.  We have already reached 46% of our $10,000 goal and just 12 out of the 48 employees have turned in their pledges.  Of course, the most eager are generally going to be the most generous, but not necessarily.  We had fun at our kickoff --- Between my experience teaching Middle School and my time spent at Pampered Chef Consultant Meetings, let's just say my new co-workers don't see my quiet personality quite the same anymore.   In case you've never seen me in front of a group of people, well, I can get a little goofy because for some strange reason it makes me more comfortable if people are laughing at or with me!  (Did you know those robbers took my bunny ears I wore to announce the Midtown Easter Egg hunt?!?!) People seem genuinely thrilled to have some energy for the campaign this year-- a lot of people have thanked me (and the other keyworker) for making it fun and not so serious.  One person said, "Thanks, Jen! We never had anything like that before!"  And that's awesome when you are talking about a mandatory 8AM meeting!

How do you make a request for contributions fun?  You say stupid stuff like "in case you are challenged in math like myself, they have this chart attached right here to your pledge card so you can cheat and figure out what your weekly amount x 26 pays equals", and you hand out miniature noise makers and encourage sleepy people wearing work clothes to laugh and make noise whenever you say "CFC"!  Then you say "CFC" a lot, and when they stop making noise, you repeat yourself until they make noise despite themselves.  (Think word of the day from that show... what was it... Pee Wee Herman!)  Oh, and give them doughnuts.  And then, once they're already smiling, just ask a bunch of rhetorical questions and leave the choice to them.... 

Maybe some of my rhetorical questions will lead you to support a nonprofit before year end as well.... it's a tax deduction you know....  betcha a dollar goes a LOT further in a nonprofit than it does as tax revenue.  

What are some of your favorite comforts in your life?  Can you think of a group of people who might need one of those things?  Have you ever had a time where a helping hand made all the difference to you in your scenario?  Is there a group that's doing something similar for others so you can pay the favor forward?  Do you, a family member, or a friend have a health problem that needs more research, support, or aid for it's victims?  Do you have a favorite but often forgotten person, place, or thing?  Is it pets, kids, senior citizens, or some other worthy group?  What cause matters to you?  

Difficult economical times are especially difficult on non-profits because people are less willing to give.   Isn't it ironic that it is during the difficult economic times that the non-profits are needed the most?  A little bit often goes a really long way, and the joy you'll feel after sharing is more than worth your sacrifice!

FACEBOOK is where it's at ....

Sorry I haven't posted very regularly lately.  I seem to be much more motived to go to Facebook these days.  It's fun to see what people are up to.  See you there...

Ups and Downs

OK, so I was strong at first.  It really is just STUFF, and we really are fine.  But as time unfolded, so did reality.  

Reality is that it is really annoying when someone comes and takes your stuff away.  It is annoying not to have a frying pan at the moment or a TV to watch in the treadmill room.  

And it is even more annoying that the insurance company and police need you to list EVERYTHING, item by item.  Not just "75 DVDs", "toolbox full of tools" or "Calphalon pots".  Nope.  Specific DVD names, specific tools and how many of each, or which specific set of Calphalon and the size of the missing pots.  But they also want to know when you bought them, how much you paid for them, and how much it would cost to replace them now.   Sure, you could be haphazard and not stress over your estimates.  OR, you could be a perfectionist like myself trying to find exact matches of what is missing somewhere online and stressing over making your estimates as good as they can be.   Better yet, you could be a married couple representing each of those personalities and trying to work together for hours at a time.

Our list so far is over 150 items long, and replacement value will probably be well over $15,000.  Do you know that I kept onto way more receipts than your typical person.... right up until we were moving and I'd never needed them?!?  AHHH!

I don't know for sure, but between the burglary, the bump in the road for the adoption, and a few other pieces of junk lately, I'd say there must be something pretty good and God-filled on the horizon that Satan really wants to distract us from.... perhaps it's my upcoming journey on "The Ride" or perhaps something amazing is going to happen regarding our first child or maybe it's something we haven't even dreamed about yet.

I think I'll try to remember to start my prayers this week with something along the lines of... "God, please help me hear your truth and recognize the lies in my head.  Thanks for the zillions of blessings in my life and the people in it.  Help me not to get bogged down in the negative thoughts and feeling overwhelmed.  God, intelluctually I know that EVERYTHING in my life is in your hands.  Help me to feel that emotionally and to truly let you hold it up for me without trying to do it myself.  I'm going to fail every time, God.  But you will never fail.  Ever.  Thanks for that, and thanks for being stronger than I could ever comprehend.  Amen."

Burglary Truth

In case you haven't heard, our home was broken into while we were at work on Wednesday. They took a lot of stuff, but we are fine.  Here are some things I've been thinking about since...

Stuff is just stuff and easy to replace.  Some stuff is harder to replace if it is filled with associations and memories.  But, really, is it the stuff itself you are longing for?

EVERYONE needs an alarm system.  I don't care if you don't have much stuff, live in a safe area, trust people, or what.  For $20 a month, you could at least feel confident upon entering your residence that someone else is not in there waiting for you.  (Our new alarm system is being installed Tuesday... in the meantime, they already gave us the window stickers to scare the bad guys away.  Strangely comforting, those stickers.)

Backing up your computer is not enough.  Backing it up at an alternate location altogether is priceless.  Ben's pictures and countless quicken entries are waiting in cyberspace for his new computer.  My adoption profile work, some journaling, pictures, and who knows how many organizational files are gone forever.

USAA insurance and ID theft protection have a monthly cost.  The comfort they have given me the last few days is priceless.

I have an amazing husband, wonderful family, and awesome friends.  I also have a fabulously satisfying and fulfilling job.  Nobody can enter my home and take those truths from me.

Dave Ramsey and other financial planners' "emergency fund" concept is a really good one. Canceling your only credit card because of ID theft-- and knowing it will take several days even with express mail to get your replacement card-- makes you really grateful for old fashioned cash.

God turns ALL things to good.  We don't know for sure yet, but we expect to have some insurance money left after replacing what we want to replace.  We might just be able to take care of some things in our home including a dishwasher and oven that are actually younger than me.  Once we are officially "waiting" for a birthmom to choose us, maybe we WILL be able to take a vacation after all.  We were expecting to need to wait quite awhile for all of that.

No need to count your blessings.  Just look around and realize how much God loves you. Amazing, isn't it?

Maya Angelou Poem

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... 

enough 

money within her control to move out 

and rent a place of her own, 

even if she never wants to or needs to... 

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... 

something 

perfect to wear if the employer, 

or date of her dreams 

wants to see her in an hour... 

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... 

a youth she's content to leave behind.... 

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .. 

a past juicy 

enough that she's looking forward to 

retelling it in her 

old age....

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... 

a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra... 

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .. 

one friend who 

always makes her laugh.. and one who lets her cry... 

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... 

a good piece 

of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her 

family... 

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .. 

eight 

matching plates, wine glasses with stems, 

and a recipe for 

a meal, 

that will make her guests feel honored... 

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE . 

a feeling of 

control over her destiny.. 

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD 

KNOW... 

how to fall in love without losing herself.. 

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 

how to quit 

a job, 

break up with a lover, 

and confront a friend 

without; 

ruining the friendship... 

EVERY WOMAN 

SHOULD KNOW... 

when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK 

AWAY... 

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 

that she can't change the length of her calves, 

the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents.. 

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 

that her 

childhood may not have been perfect...but it's over... 

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 

what she 

would and wouldn't do for love or more... 

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.... 

how to live 

alone... even if she doesn't like it... 

EVERY 

WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. 

whom she can trust, 

whom she can't, 

and why she shouldn't take it personally... 

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... 

where to 

go... 

be it to her best friend's kitchen table.. 

or a 

charming Inn in the woods.... 

when her soul needs 

soothing... 

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. 

What she can and can't accomplish in a day... 

a 

month...and a year... 

prayer request

Well, it seems we have hit a pretty significant snafu in our adoption process. Our adoption specialist assures us it does not mean we will not be able to adopt through Bethany, just that there are some things to take care of before we move forward. It is extremely personal (even for me), so I am not going to go into more details than that. I'm grateful that I've recently been reminded several times that God's plan does not always follow our expectations, nor does it always make sense.

Please pray for Ben and I as we seek answers and adjust to this news. I pray from the bottom of my heart, and with great earnestness, that God will grant us peace with the process, be especially present in our communication with one another, and give us guidance in what this all means for us and our family.

I am extremely grateful for our dear friends and family, who I know will be super supportive while all this gets sorted out. We love you guys.

Adoption Meeting

Today was a really busy day off, and I'm exhausted. I'm about to turn in for the night.

But I wanted to let everyone know that my adoption meeting this morning went fine. We have a few misc. documents to gather up, then we'll get our home study scheduled.

We're having church folks over this Saturday for our first shin-dig at our new home, so I'm trying to get the house ready. Not that they would care how it looks (one of the things I love about Midtown!) but because it's an excellent "deadline" and reason for me to get some things taken care of that I still have on my TO DO list.

Good Night!

Independent Jen

Jen time. I think my husband is better than any husband I could ever deserve, and better than the best match for me I ever dreamed up. However, I still LOVE my Jen time. When we were dating, Ben would call me "Independent Jen" whenever I'd ask for a day off from phone calls (yes, even when we were long distance dating). I'd say "I need a Jen day" or "I need Jen time". See, it isn't about Ben at all, it's about me. I mean, I was single a long time and personal space was hard to give up!

So, fast forward 3 years into our marriage. My need for Jen time is less, but does still creep up. And Ben is good about giving me space, or not complaining if I disappear for a day running errands. Or "get lost" in Target or Wal-Mart.... for hours.

Please don't think ill of me when I get excited about my honey bunches going away to Florida for a business trip in the morning. Or that I asked him to call me just ONCE while he's gone. This annual business trip is the only three and a half days we spend apart each year. Pretty much, except if I head to Baltimore for a quick weekend. He's just gone from Wednesday morning until Saturday evening. And, for me, nothing could be better for our relationship. I think they created the saying "absence makes the heart grow fonder" with me in mind.

Freedom! Imagine! Three and a half days where the house cleanliness and picked-up-ness is only affected by me. No dishes miraculously appearing in the sink and no newspapers spontaneously appearing all over the living room. And where I get to do my own schedule, based on my own wants and whims, and without regard to what's best for or most desired by my husband.

Now, just you wait. By Saturday I'll be checking my watch every few minutes to see how much longer until Ben's plane lands or until Ben drives into our garage! (Seriously. I think if you look to my blog entry from a year ago, you will see that is exactly what happened last August!)

But for the moment, at least, I'm very excited about my Jen time and having the house all to my self. (-;

PMS influenced rant

Do you ever wonder "what's the point?". Seriously. I spent my preschool days looking forward to Kindergarten, then all of elementary school time looking forward to high school. Then all of high school looking forward to college. Then college looking forward to getting a job. Ironically, as I reached each of those milestones, I'd realize how much fun I'd had in that past phase and, by then, it was gone forever.

When I got a job, I looked forward to getting a different job, and, now that I truly enjoy my work (most days, at least), I still look forward to the weekends. BUT, now I am at the end of my weekend, and I'm thinking about how much I wasted of my weekend, how I didn't really enjoy much of it (except dinner last night --- thanks MOM!), and how many things I SHOULD have taken care of that I didn't. Maybe I'll get them taken care of next weekend. Or maybe I'll waste that one, too.

Of course I realize that there is a point. The most fulfilling aspects of life are our relationships with others and allowing God to live through us. But isn't it just sometimes too easy to get distracted in self absorption and stray off that path?

Am I alone here? Can I get an "AMEN"?

Merry Christmas, Ben

Ben saved his Christmas money for the NEW version of iPhone. Meaning, he patiently waited from December until the new and improved version came out in July. Me on the other hand, I wanted it right then, so I got mine for Christmas on Chirstmas. Poor Ben, though, after all that patient waiting, when they finally came out he wasn't eligible for the discounted price. So we hesitated just a couple of days while we figured out that we could transfer my eligibility to his number..... so then we had to order it because, of course, AT&T was out and we had to get it through them due to our complicated scenario.

Anyway, just wanted to let you all know -- and rest easier -- that we picked up Ben's iPhone tonight. He's happily getting it all synced up and just his way in the other room.

Merry Christmas, Honey Bunches! (not that it was from me.... it was from Santa, I mean my parents..)

His cell phone number is the same. And he'd love for you to give him a call. (-;

Facebook Photo Album

I added an album to facebook.... you can see it even if you don't belong to facebook:
Facebook Photos

Guest Nursery

We have a guest room and a guest nursery. Leif got to use the guest nursery today, and of course Amie, Ben and Sonny were the first to use the guest room and guest nursery. Anyway, I'd promised to post some photos of our cute froggie nursery. It's not completely done -- we'll probably get yellow walls, etc-- but it's probably done until there is an adopted Greenwald baby on its way.


Oh, and check out Ben practicing his "Daddy" skills:



Aren't they both cute?

Adoption Individual Meetings

We've scheduled our individual meetings with our adoption counselor, Elizabeth. That's the next step for us. Ben's is next week and mine is on the 11th. They are 1.5 hours. Not exactly sure what they'll be like, but I think it is to sort of review our self study paperwork as well as how we individually feel about adoption.

Meanwhile we ought to be working on our profile. Anybody have pictures of us we should be sure to include? It's hard to know what will catch the eyes of the birthmoms.... then again, the important thing isn't the profile or the pictures and words in the profile. It's trusting God on His timing and choice for our family. Of course, that isn't to say we won't put lots of effort into the profile, just that we need to try not to stress out over it. (-;

About 3 of the couples from our class already have their profiles posted on the Bethany website. They're way ahead of us! It is kind of strange to flip through those thinking about what ours should say. On one hand they all sort of say "Choose us, we'll give your baby a great home, we believe in God, and we're neat people". On the other hand, one way or another, we need to make our profile personal and individual enough so that it touches the birthparents that are looking for people like us.

Strange. An advertisement brochure - complete with pictures- to choose us as parents for your baby. A necessary evil for this day and age I suppose. What a weird world we live in.

Swimming Sonny

Here are some of my favorite shots from July 5th when Amie, Sonny, Ben and I all went to the Johnsons'. Sonny got to experience floaties for the first time and did just great. He's a fish.

HELLO? Anyone there?

Maybe other people with blogs experience this, too, but sometimes I wonder if I'd be accomplishing the same thing by just writing in a private journal. When you blog, you don't really know how many people actually read what you write. Which is ok, I guess, but then I wonder what my focus audience is. You know what I mean?

Then again, I happen to be an open person, so I don't care if I wear my thoughts and feelings on my sleeve. It's mostly for myself anyway. I think. But I'm not really sure....

Well, if you do read what I write, thanks for reading. And I hope I'm not boring your pants off!

Missing Friends

Lifegroup was just not right tonight. It is very, very empty without the Armstrongs. Lee came tonight (a rare treat since he travels so much), so at least it wasn't just Ben and Jen and the Johnson family. Not that I don't like the Johnsons, just that it feels like Lifegroup is best when it is more than 5 people, you know?!?

Anyway, we extend a special invitation to anyone from Midtown who is looking for a lifegroup.... please join us next Wednesday and help us decide what to study next. Just finished Watchman Nee's Sit Walk Stand tonight... so it's a great time to jump in and give us a try!

Wall-E Reward

Well, Ben and I both finished filling out the "self study" questionnaire that has been haunting us since our last adoption class on May 5th. I was flipping through our packet of needed documents, and we had forgotten about the "Openness Options" questionnaire that we also need. But we've talked through most of those, so it shouldn't be too time consuming.... Anyway, we made BIG TIME progress today... so I'll take what we've done to Elizabeth, our adoption counselor, on Monday. The next step is for each of us to have an individual interview with her, and then we will have our home study. Meanwhile, it is time to work on putting together our profile. That's another time consuming project, but a friend from our class shared a program for the computer that should really help out with the layout.

Our end of the day "reward" for our hard work was to go see Wall-E. It was a great movie. You should know before you go that there is no dialogue for most of the movie, but you don't really miss it. The music and animation were extremely well done, and the story is sweet. It also makes a pretty political point about our messy world and lazy society. I'm not big into the whole global warming scheme, or the need for "going green", but there does need to be some respect for our environment. Point well taken.

See you at church chow!

Whew, I need a break.

This adoption paperwork is down right oppressive. We ARE going to finish it today, though. I'm making great progress. Just needed a break. So far I have 17 typed pages of questions and answers, and I still have several sections to go.

Adoption is just very different from having a romantic night together and having a baby 9 months later, I tell you what! Blood work, fingerprinting with background checks, 911 history check (do you think we might be refused from that time I cleaned the oven while away at church and the FABULOUS East Point firemen had to come?!?), physicals, references from your pastor, references from your friends, references from work, references from a family member, meeting with an adoption counselor, adoption classes, CPR class, no certainty on how long your wait might be - a few months or a few years?!- and a home invasion. Oops, I mean home study. (-;

Seriously, though, Bethany is fabulous and does their best not to make it all as oppressive as it could be. I'm just thankful we're working with them and not some crazy Adoption Facilitator like this lady named Marcia we went to an introduction meeting for. "Pay us lots of extra money, and you'll have your baby in just a few months!"

Speaking of attaining beautiful babies, many CONGRATS to Donna Marie and Mark on the arrival of their precious son Will. His big sister Gwennan is adorable, so no doubt he will be also!

The last boxes

Shouldn't there be a law about the last boxes that go unpacked? I guess we're down to about a half dozen boxes. But we've been down to those for over a week now. And there they still sit. I think I should just throw them and their contents into a bin for Goodwill. I mean, we've lived here two months. The stuff in them can't be THAT important, right?

Meanwhile I did unpack the China into the "new" china cabinet and it looks very pretty. I also got the nursery set up including a recliner, a crib, a changing table and a good bit of the decor for my froggie pattern. Sonny is making good use of it all.

I've pretty much found a place for everything except my two card tables and 8 folding chairs. I think they'll end up in an upstairs closet, but not until I actually FEEL like carting them all up there.

I will try to get some pictures posted of all that maybe next weekend....

It's Jen not Jenn

I don't know why some people want to spell Jen with two n's. The second "n" is useless, unless it is in the middle of Jennifer. Then the 2nd "n" is part of the "nif" part of "jen" "nif" "fer".

The easy way to remember which way I spell it? Well, check out my blog name and email address. But, easier yet, it matches my hubby, Ben. Not Benn. Not that wouldn't make ANY sense, would it?

Speaking of names, I bought a baby name book last weekend. Ben and I have a girl name all picked out. My friend in Maryland has a beautiful name with a beautiful spelling, so we're planning on sharing it. But boy names?!? We just can't figure that one out. Not that there is any hurry. Just weird, I think. When we were first trying to get pregnant, we came up with our girl name pretty early on. But a boy name, not so easy. Two years have gone by, and no name yet! Again, no hurry.

What do you think about Forrest Greenwald? (Greenwald is german for Green Forest). And, YES, I am completely kidding!

FROG

MY FRIEND AIDIE SHARED THIS WITH ME.... I THINK IT'S GREAT ADVICE.... FOR HOME AND WORK

There's an old saying that says..."If the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning is eat a live frog, then nothing worse can happen for the rest of the day!" Well, I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty safe assumption.

your "frog" should be the most difficult item on your things to do list, the one where you're most likely to procrastinate; because, if you eat that first, it'll give you energy and momentum for the rest of the day. But, if you don't...and let him sit there on the plate and stare at you while you do a hundred unimportant things, it can drain your energy and you won't even know it.

So, here's your assignment: for the next 30 days take a look at your list, circle the frog, and eat that first.

baby gear

Well, I found a beautiful Bonavita "Jamie" white crib on Craigs List. We got it over the weekend. That's in plenty of time for Sonny's visit. Of course, Sonny would be fine in a pack and play for 3 or so weeks, but I thought it was a great reason to go ahead and begin to furnish our future nursery. (-: And if you have a crib, you need the crib bedding, right? No one wants a naked crib. So I went to Target and got the stuff I've been eyeing since Christmas. Also ordered a white changing table from Target. Later, probably once we have actually been choosen by a birthmom, we'll also add a white dresser to complete the room. Keeping it gender neutral on purpose-- even when picked, there is always the chance it won't work out. And, maybe one day we'll be getting a second baby of a different gender than the first. (-:

So, here's the adorable "Tiddliwinks Froggie" look I am going for:



And, no, Ben and I have not yet gotten all of our adoption paperwork turned in. We've made progress on it all, though. Hopefully having a crib will get us motivated to get it all submitted this week. Then we'll do individual meetings with our adoption specialist, then she'll come do a home inspection and -hopefully- do the final, official approval of us, then we'll finish up our profile and it will start to get shown to birthmothers, and then we wait. It's typically the birthmother's choice that determines which baby goes to which couple. I hope to try to work on our profile while Amie is here. She's very good at layouts and stuff, and will probably take no time to figure out the scrapbooking software an adoption class friend shared with me. No doubt in our hearts that God already has our future baby picked out, and that his timing will be just right-- even if it's not the first time we get picked. We are doing an open adoption, which typically means you get to meet with the Birthmother while she's pregnant, then be at the hospital during and after the birth, and then take the baby home on the 3rd day. Things become final- in other words legally bound- on the 10th day of the baby's life. But we will still stay in touch with the Birthmom and she still gets to see the baby a few times during the first couple of years.

Anyway, my day today is packed full. Stanley Steamer already came and cleaned our former coffee couch and our living room area rug. Larry came by so we could talk over the ways he can "clean up" our slightly overgrown yard next week. (Looking forward to that progress!). I have plenty of laundry and cleaning to do throughout the house today, but also need to go get my allergy shots and run to Home Depot. I'd thought I'd try to get a pedicure squeezed in, but not so sure there will be time for that today. I'll also be meeting with John who will service our A/C. So, I best be gettin' goin' so I can "ENJOY" my day "OFF"!

May God grant you peace and rest today and every day.

Get Thee to the Movies!!!

Wow. There are some great movies right now. Ben and I love going to the movies for our Friday date nights. Kung Fu Panda was awesome. Find a kid to take, or go without one like we did!

We've seen most of the current top rated Rotten Tomatoes Movies, and we agree with those ratings!

93% Iron Man
87% Kung Fu Panda
85% Forgetting Sarah Marshall
78% Dr. Seuss' Horton Hears a Who!
77% Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Anyone seen either of these? We haven't... yet....
92% U2 3D
78% The Bank Job

What's Rotten Tomatoes? Are your serious? You don't KNOW?!? Only the most reliable way to choose which movies to go to.... and which to wait to get on Netflicks.... http://www.rottentomatoes.com/

Visitors

Amie and Ben are going to be our first overnight guests in our new home next week. They hope to close on the sale of their condo Wednesday morning, and then they'll stay here a night, and then Ben will head on up to Wisconsin. Ben and I get to enjoy Amie's company until mid-July, and Sonny will be joining her about a week into her stay. He gets to go to Grandma Keck's during the crazy moving week. It's a little bittersweet, really. Sooo excited for them to visiting, but sooo sad that means they are moving soon. We did figure out that Madison, WI is just a few hours from Dubuque, so we'll have to somehow include them in a family visit to Iowa next year.

We had Suzanne and Jasmine over briefly before going out to dinner with them Sunday eve. I was supposed to make dinner, but, well, I didn't get to that. Did make huge strides in making the house more presentable, though. Anyway it was great to see them.

I think I found a pretty and well made, safe white crib that's actually available on Craig's list... There had been another, Pottery Barn set, but I wasn't quick enough to get it several weeks ago. I guess that makes me officially addicted, doesn't it? Two great finds in two weekends?!

Somehow my weekends keep filling up. I don't think I used to be this busy. Nor this social. It's a little strange, a bit fabulous, and a tad tiring all at once. After working OT last weekend and working a full week this week for the first time in awhile, I'm truly looking forward to next Monday off!

China Cabinet

I was really excited about our new China cabinet. In fact, it is gorgeous, just what I wanted, and was a spectacular Craig's list deal. 'Cept we had to go to Hiram, GA to get it. And we bought it from an older gentleman, so I wasn't exactly sure how Ben and I would get it into my Dad's pickup on our own. So I suggested Ben call Charles and see if he could help.

Well, turns out the entire Spoelstra family of 3 felt like going on a drive, and Dawn wanted to see our new house anyway... so, they went from Marietta and we went from Dunwoody, and we met up at this Hiram Guy's home. Strange when you think about it... all 6 of our lives momentarily converging in Hiram, GA. Anyway, I do love the china cabinet and will one day soon have a blast unpacking my beautiful China into a place where people can see it.... but it turned out to be a great day because we got a great new China Cabinet AND we also had a terrific visit with Dawn, Charles, and Leif!

We're home!

We really enjoyed our visit with Linda and Louie, and we got to see our niece Taylor, our nephews Zachary and Brandon, as well as Ben's brother John and his wife Amy. I'll post a few pics soon.

We're home now. Kinda weird to come home to our new house.... but didn't take too long to get used to the idea. (-:

I got lots of my half of our adoption paperwork done on the plane ride home. Maybe I'll feel up to typing it all into the computer tomorrow. Maybe not, but I'm ready to be done with our part and into the waiting phase.

Well, even though my body thinks it's just 9:30, I still feel tired so off to bed for me!

BORING BABBLE...

Our cats really like their new house, I think. They have lots of room, not to mention stairs, where they can run and chase each other. And last night, Ben and I were watching TV and they just snuggled and snuggled with one another. They hadn't been snuggling as much once we got our old house de-cluttered and on the market. Maybe they could sense the stress and impending change. So happy they seem happy! They also have (at least) two random cats that show up at our sliding glass doors to peer in. Hysterical to watch them all try to sniff through the glass!

In the morning, we have our CPR certification class. One of those things potential adoptive parents have to do. Once that is done, we will have to work on our paperwork. There are lots of introspective questions to answer on long, individual questionnaires. I'm thinking I might take mine with us on our trip to Iowa over Memorial Day weekend to try to get a running start on it all. Then we'll have individual interviews with our adoption counselor, and then the last step before "just waiting" is to put together the profile all the prospective birth Moms will view.

Our house got cleaned today, and we had worked on getting boxes more in order earlier this week. We still have a long way to go, but it's starting to feel more comfortable. A lot of the boxes are books and files that just need to be put in their place in the office. I'm hoping to make progress on that and hanging all the towel bars, hooks, etc over my long weekend. I'm really hoping we won't move for at least 15 years... I'm not such a fan of this moving thing.

I only have to work 3 days next week and 3 days the week after. Monday is my regular off day, and then we leave for Iowa on Friday and fly back Monday evening. I took Tuesday off as well because I do lots better when I have a day at home after a vacation.

I'm looking forward to our trip to Iowa. We'll be visiting Ben's parents, and hopefully get to see a niece and nephews as well. Hadn't realized it, but I had only been to Iowa in the cold months. It should be neat to see it this time of year.

My new job is going very well. I had a performance review today that was very positive. In comparison to the office from whence I came, the new office is better managed, we (the claims representatives) have more time to work our work, and the overall positive morale in the office are all great improvements! Interesting news.... my prior boss (whom I did NOT particularly
like working under or with or around... ) announced her retirement. Sure hope they get someone positive and good down there in Morrow!

Talk at you later! Enjoy the weekend, y'all!

Mothers Day

Isn't it great that Mothers' Day celebrates all the awesome Moms out there? I know both my Mom and mother in law are incredible Moms, and deserve all the celebration, appreciation, and gifts they can get. And I have lots of girlfriends who are awesome Mothers. It's fun to watch friends learn to be Moms. You know, you knew them before they were ever married, then they got married, and now they have little ones....

It is a difficult day for a lot of people, though. Yesterday I was at Costco with about half of Atlanta. It was a zoo- especially in the flower section (the reason I personally was there). I saw a middle aged lady driving down the isle crying. I wanted to go to her and give her a hug, but resisted because I didn't know her from Eve and thought I should not invade her privacy. I understand, though. Mother's Day is really hard if you've lost your Mom recently, or if you've always hoped to be a Mom, only to find out that you aren't going to be able to have any kids. Worse yet, think about the almost Moms. Women who are mothers, but lost their babies before they were ever born.

In adoption class last Monday, they reminded us about an entirely different group of people to remember on Mother's Day. There are many, many birth Moms out there that chose life for their babies and then, out of love and graciousness, gave their babies up for adoption. No one gets to give them a card, a hug, or a even a thank you. They probably aren't comfortable standing up or getting a rose at church. But they are some of the best and least selfish Moms around.

I thank God today and everyday for the birth Mom of our future child or children. I pray that God loves her and takes care of her, and helps her know just how special she is. And I thank God in advance for the sacrifice she will have to make in a time of crisis in her life in order to chose life for her unborn baby.

Happy Mothers Day.... to all of the mothers, birth mothers, and adoptive mothers!

Settling In ... at least a little

Hi everyone.

I have finally been catching up on my sleep, so I am feeling much more myself. Our bed continues to be AWESOME and comfy, even in its new home. And we no longer have airplane noises to put us to sleep.

We got our new washer and dryer today. They're the neat new high energy front loading kind. We used consumer reports to decide which ones to get. We're already doing our first load. Also, the DISH network is here setting that up for us. Dad very generously gave us another of his HD flat screen TVs, so we're looking forward to some great TV viewing. No worries, Dad upgraded at his house, so he is not doing without. (-;

My computer is all hooked up now, and our office is coming together a little at a time. It is nice to have my desk in place and mostly set up. I can relax here! (-:

Thanks so much to our Lifegroup who came and helped us for a few hours on Wednesday evening... they unpacked some of our boxes for us.

Yesterday, Erika and my sister came by. My Mom has been helping a ton-- which included yesterday. We got my kitchen underway. I have so much kitchen stuff, though. It fit in my prior kitchen, but that was new construction. Having some issues in this 1970's house, but I expect to get some additional furniture to use as a pantry, so that will help a lot.

We'll get our kitty cats this evening.... Baxter is such a crazy and curious cat that it just hasn't been safe for him yet! We'll do a bit more kitty proofing and then go get them from Grammy and Grampy Julyan's!

communication breakdown

I haven't checked e-mail in days. Feels like an eternity! Ben got our Internet up last night, but I haven't set up my computer yet.

Also, our cell phones barely work at our new house -- oh, btw, we did close, move in, and finally got our power on. We slept here last night for the first time. Anyway, if you try our cell numbers and miss us, you can leave voicemail, but you may also want to try our new home phone! (-:

Well I am typing this on my iPhone, so I think that is as much updating as my Ambien influenced right pointer finger can take...

Call or come by! We have plenty of unpacking left should you find yourself with nothing to do...

SOLD!

Hooray! We closed on the sale of our East Point home!

We will close on the purchase of our Dunwoody home tomorrow.

Movers Scheduled

Our closing is scheduled for today at 4 PM, and they actually have the packet at the attorney's office. Hooray!

Our movers are moving us tomorrow (Tuesday). I have been approved for leave on both Tuesday and Wednesday, so I will be returning to work on Thursday.

We would love and really appreciate some help getting settled in on Wednesday and/or this Saturday if you happen to be available... just shoot me an email. (-:

Thanks bunches for your prayers!

Clear to Close!?!?

I'm not 100% convinced, but apparently Bank of America has pronounced our buyer's loan clear to close and the "packet" is on it's way to the attorney's office. We're scheduled for a 4:00 closing today. I think I'll fully believe that once everything is signed, but I will call to start arranging the movers and utilities as soon as Scott, our realtor, calls to let us know that the packet is in the hands of the closing attorney's office, and it is in time for the 4:00 closing to happen.

Limbo Land

Well, as of close of business on Friday, our closing attorney's office still had not gotten the infamous "packet". Which means we are still completely in limbo.

Our kitties are with their Grammy and Grampy Julyan, as we took them there when we thought we were going to close at 4:30 Friday.... which, of course, did not happen. This house is lonely without them, but it doesn't seem fair for them to have to spend an hour in the car to bring them home and then take them back a few days later. Good news is that they thrive there. My parents spoil them with affection, and are home more than Ben and I are.

Our house is a catastrophe, which puts me even more on edge. Boxes everywhere, things half-packed, odds and ends that have been removed from their official place, but not yet gotten to a box. We figure we might as well pack a little here and there because that will mean our movers will cost less.... we will be charged an hourly rate for 4 guys, so the more we do, the fewer hours they'll take.

At this point, I've told our realtor not to call us until the packet is with the closing attorney and we are ready to schedule a closing for certain, or if it becomes certain that these people won't be able to close at all. The hour by hour updates and what if's were way to stressful, and literally wasted both Thursday and Friday away. Not going there again. Not gonna do it.

We cancelled the turn off of our major utilities and our internet/TV, and didn't even bother to guess when they will need to be turned off. We postponed the delivery of our new washer and dryer, and the set up of our new TV and internet. Our movers kept our deposit since we cancelled last minute- luckily that was $170 and not more, and we did not reschedule them either. We decided we won't rearrange any of those things until the closing is final. Unfortunately, when (or if!?!) we do close, it will mean a lot of scrambling to arrange the utilities, et al. But better that then having to call to change it all a third time. (Our original closing was supposed to be on April 10th, so I'd already done the first round of changing dates before doing this second round on Friday!)

It hasn't been a fun experience at all, but we'll make it through eventually, I guess! We do trust that God will work it all out in his time, and that He turns ALL things to GOOD. The interim just sorta sucks!

We're grateful for everyone's prayers, and the support of our friends and family. Thanks so much! We love you!

No Closing Means No Moving

Well, our buyers weren't able to close again today, so we've called the movers to cancel them. They say they can close on Monday afternoon, but at this point, I'll believe it when I see it. We are starting to have doubts about if they'll be able to get their mortgage at all, as all we keep hearing is that the lender hasn't been able to finalize things and they won't be able to get it ready by whatever the last time we'd come up with for a closing. We really don't KNOW what is happening and why the bank keeps delaying things.

We absolutely will not move until we've sold this house. I certainly feel horrible for the people we're buying from, and pray that somehow we'll still be able to get this one sold and move there soon.

I think our home phone will be cut off on Sunday, so be sure to call us on our cell phones until we get to move to the new house.

The one good thing to come from all this is that now, I won't have to miss Midtown's Ladies Retreat this weekend.

Please pray for Ben and me that we'll continue to trust God's timing, and that He turns ALL things to good.

Just a partial closing today....

The buyers' lending company for our house didn't have their act together, so we spent most of the day on the phone trying to ascertain if they could close today-- which they kept saying maybe, but they never committed to it. It was hard getting any information for the majority of the day. Of course that was pretty stressful considering we had a closing scheduled to buy a house at 2!

Meanwhile, we did close "in escrow" for the house we are buying. That means we went and signed everything so as soon as the money from our sale gets wired, that will be a done deal and we can just go pick up the keys.

The "good" news is that the buyers' loan is fine and should go through. We're waiting now to find out if our buyers' lender got their "packet" to the closing attorney's office before close of business today. If they did get it in, we will close at 9 in the morning. However, I am assuming they did not since we haven't heard anything and it's almost 7. Hopefully, then, it will get there first thing in the morning. If it does, we should close at 11AM, and then the money should be wired to our other closing attorney's office, and once they get the wire transfer confirmation a few hours later, we can pick up the keys and start moving stuff in to our new home. I'm guessing that will be around 1 tomorrow. But no guarantees.

It's been pretty yucky today-- we certainly hoped that since we'd given them a week longer than they had asked for that our buyers' lender would be ready-- but, alas, that wasn't the case. God will work it out.... just hoping he does tomorrow since it's too late to cancel our movers on Saturday! (-;

Did you get the E-Vite?

I sent out an E-Vite invitation to our "Greatest Ever Unpacking Party". I certainly did not mean to leave anyone out, so if you didn't get it, shoot me an email so I can add you to the list! (-:

GREATEST EVER UNPACKING PARTY

YOU ARE INVITED....

TO AN UNPACKING PARTY!

At our new home.... Sunday, April 27 at 1:00PM until we can't take it any more.

We'll feed you lunch, drinks, and snacks.

More details later, but pretty please save the date. (-:

We've got movers to do the moving and packing up, but would love some help getting things out of the boxes and put away. Feel free to drop by for a short time or as long as you'd like... even if your real motivation is to check out our new place! (-:

Hooray!

Well, it's all set. We are under contract to buy our new home! BOTH closings are scheduled for Thursday, April 24th. We'll have movers come on Saturday the 26th, so our first night at the new house will be on the 26th.

We're so grateful for so many answered prayers, and the support of our friends and family. Thanks so much! We love you!

Completely NEW plan.....

Well, things changed. First, our buyers had a hiccup with their original loan plan, so now they are doing a VA loan. That usually takes longer, and they had submitted a request to change the closing date to one week later. However, after asking around about VA loans, Ben and I asked them to stretch it two weeks later. We're still waiting on their response, but hope that will work out. I had already done all the phone calls to transfer, cancel, and set up movers, utilities, the cleaning guy, etc and I was not pleased with the prospect of having to undo all that, redo it for a week later, and then having to undo and redo again because they'd been too optimistic... anyway, with the new timeframe, we started thinking, well, maybe we DO have time to find a house... So, we put a hold on the apartment lease. Thankfully, we only lost $100 for the application fee (ie credit check).

We looked around at houses yesterday and today, and WE DECIDED ON ONE!!! We're meeting with the realtor tomorrow afternoon to put together our offer. My parents came to check out the two we'd narrowed it down to, and they both agreed that the one we're going with was a better choice, and they both seemed to like it a lot. Ben had been leaning that way as well, and they all convinced me. Now I'm super excited about it.



In case you want to look it up, here's the info: 4674 Pyrenees Court - MLS# 3620253 . It is in Dunwoody, off of Tilly Mill. The house is on a cul-de-sac and has four bedrooms and 3 full baths. We are excited about having a garage, and the master suite is bigger than most in our price range in Dunwoody -- it will actually fit our monstrous bedroom furniture! The fourth bedroom was listed as a first floor bedroom, but we're going to use that as our Office/Library. The yard was well cared for, and there is a great Dogwood tree out the kitchen window. Ben's commute will be 5.4 miles and mine will be 11.1 miles (opposite traffic). EXCELLENT! It feeds into Chestnut Elementary School, Peachtree Middle School, and Dunwoody High. The pictures in the listing have wallpaper and colorful rooms, but they went through and made it all neutral with no wallpaper. (What goes around comes around, eh?) Best of all, it is 100% move-in ready and vacant so a pretty quick closing should not be a problem. We'll probably ask to do the 25th, assuming that our buyers agree to the 24th. Then we'd move on Saturday the 26th. Hmm. That's just three weeks from now...

Apartment Dwellers

Well, we made the decision to rent an apartment. There was one 4 miles from Ben's work (an awesome change for him!) that allowed us to get a decent price with just a four month contract. We'll be moving into Post Oglethorpe on Friday the 11th. It's a roomy two bedroom apartment with a two car garage that we will use as our "storage unit" and have everything under one roof again. Hopefully, this will allow us to take our time choosing the right house for us and to save a little more for a down payment.

This apartment thing was more Ben's idea than mine, and it hasn't been an easy week for our marriage, but things seem to be getting better. Change is hard no matter how much of a blessing the change represents, I suppose. I was NOT happy that this would mean needing to move twice in half a year. I like order and I was REALLY looking forward to nesting in my new home and preparing the house for the baby we'll be adopting and the rest of our lives! Not to mention, just three short years ago as we were pre-wedding, I moved in October, January, and again in March- and then had to adjust when Ben moved in, too. You can imagine I was ready to never, ever, ever move again!

In the end, I suppose Ben is right about getting a short term apartment. I just wish it had been a more gradual discussion and decision process rather than his sudden announcement (maybe pronouncement!?) that most of what we've been discussing and acting on about buying our next home was all wrong, and the houses we'd looked at were not really options now, and we need to hold off a few more months to save more money before buying a house.... Because, you know, I wasn't stressed enough about the fact that we got a contract with a closing date less than three weeks later and had no place to move to, so it was a GREAT idea to add fuel to that fire!

At any rate, choosing to live in an apartment for four months WILL allow us to be patient and wait for God's timing on our house purchase. It WILL allow us to cut back on our commuting expenses and time. It WILL allow us to live in the area we want to live without making a rushed decision on a long term commitment. And the drawback of moving twice, well, I guess that is offset by Ben agreeing that we can hire "real movers" for both the move out of this house and the future move from the apartment to the house we'll buy.

And, btw, we WILL buy a house in the near future! And you'd better believe when we do, I'll waste no time getting the nursery set up.... and nesting like crazy. Nesting meaning getting the house how WE want it, as opposed to just a generic house. Ben thinks it will be 18 months before we get to adopt a baby- and it could be-- but Ben also thought this house would never sell before June or July. I was pretty sure it wouldn't take very long. Hmmm. Who was right on that one? God's timing is perfect, definitely, but not always predictable! Never say never! (-:

May you rest and wait on our dear, loving father and all He has in store for you!

UNDER CONTRACT

And soon to be homeless... We accepted the 4th counteroffer and are now under contract. We are pleased with the agreed upon amount. They do have a 7 day "due dilegence" period, but there is no indication of that being a problem. The closing is scheduled for Thursday April 10th, and we'll move out the following Saturday and Sunday.

We looked at a dozen houses in Dunwoody this afternoon. A few might work, but none of them are ones we couldn't wait to jump on. It would probably be an easier search if we had another $75k to spend, but, alas, we don't! Anyway, we will not settle on something just 'cause we're in a hurry, so keep prayin' "our" house will get listed any day now! (-:

My cousin Lindsey had her baby boy on Saturday. They are in Oregon. Congrats and best wishes, Lindsey!

Getting closer to "Under Contract"

We're on counter offer 3.... they made an offer, we countered, they countered, and we countered again.... We're pretty close to their last offer, so things are looking optimistic.... just down to working out the smaller details like closing date and how much we'll pay in closing costs...

Happy Easter!

Offer and counter offer out there.... we'll see!!!

We got an offer for our house!!! We've submitted a counter offer, as it wasn't a high enough offer, but they seem to be really interested and in a hurry... If our counter offer is accepted, and everything goes well with the inspection, we'd close on April 7 and have to be out by noon April 13th... our house search just picked up some serious "umph"!

We're looking at some houses today and will probably look all weekend, but figure we'll need to get pods and stay at an extended stay or something. Grammy and Grampy Julyan have already agreed to let Baxter and Lucy stay with them, so the most important detail is worked out. (-;

East Point is fine.... we didn't even loose power.....

This was my favorite picture of the Atlanta Severe Storm Damage.... All the roof damage, cars crushed, & houses under trees were interesting.... but water pouring down steps inside a hotel? Now that I would have never predicted... what a gorgeous picture. Kinda makes me think about the Titanic, you know?



http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/cnishared/tools/shared/mediahub/00/89/66/slide2_466890_water.jpg

Thanks for sharing this story, Heather!

A teacher's first graders were discussing a picture of a family. One little boy in the picture had a different hair color than the other members. One of her students suggested that he was adopted. A little girl said, 'I know all about adoption, I was adopted..' 'What does it mean to be adopted?,’ asked another child. 'It means', said the girl, 'that you grew in your mommy's heart instead of her tummy!'

What's Up with the Georgia Greenwalds....

Congrats to Dawn and Charles on the birth of their first son, Leif Gordon Spoelstra. That baby was over 9 lbs, and Dawn has a tiny frame. You know, after hearing all my friends and their pregnancy stories, I figure I'm getting a pretty good deal with this adoption thing.... no pregnancy or labor required!

We met with our adoption specialist for the first time this afternoon, and just got home from our first Adoption Education Class with Bethany Christian Services. It was pretty interesting.... They brought in a couple with their 1 year old they'd adopted as an infant. It's pretty comforting, too, to sit in a room full of couples that have gone through infertility and are now in the waiting game of adoption.

My new job is awesome....I like this office TONS more than the one I left. It has its challenges, too, but so far I prefer these challenges to the old ones. So far, it just feels like the managers are just more realistic and supportive. It will take some time to make friends amongst co-workers, but that's ok. Being less social means more time keeping up with my work and making the best impression on my supervisors that I can, right? Ben and I met some former co-workers (Aidie and Suzanne) for dinner last week which was awesome-- sure do miss them. Suzanne was my mentor and a close friend, and our personalities are a lot alike... both the good and bad parts.... she makes me laugh! Aidie had been in Puerto Rico for a temporary detail, and it was great to see her after not seeing her for four months.

Also, the commute isn't usually as bad as I expected, just have to get myself out of the door before 7 AM and then be patient going through downtown Atlanta on the way home. Half the time I've got something going on up on the north side of town in the evenings, anyway.

There haven't been too many people looking at our house, so might as well just get used to the commute. Of course, it will take just ONE buyer to sell it. It looks great, as we did hire a friend to come and paint the living, dining, and kitchen areas a neutral color. He also repainted our Master Bath for us. I spent several hours Thursday and then 4 hours cleaning and stuff on Sunday, then the lady with the Sunday appointment to see it decided she didn't like our street, drove by and didn't even come inside. Hey, at least the house is spotless, right? (AHH!) We're sure God has it all figured out, though, and try not to worry about it too much. If it doesn't sell right away, then we get to put more aside for our Emergency Fund and down payment for the one we want to buy, not to mention the adoption fees should we get "chosen" by a birth mother, so it wouldn't be all bad.

Ben also seems to be doing great in his new position. His "probation" period ends at the end of March, so I am sure he'll feel relieved when he passes that point.

Please say a prayer for my friend Brittany and her little boy Holden. Holden (about 3 years old) has been sick with mastoiditis for at least a good six weeks now, has already had surgery- needs tons of antibotics-- and needs follow up surgery. They are also a long way away from home in Bermuda for the medical care... They had been in Baltimore at John Hopkins and then Britt, Thomas (her younger son), and Holden went to stay with her husband's family so they could be in the US while Holden was recovering and in case there were any complications. Josh (her husband) went back to Bermuda to work. Just not fun to be away from home, without your hubby, and worried about your little one!

God Bless You and Keep You Always!

Dear Dave Ramsey,

Dear Dave Ramsey,

We’re debt free and doing great with step 3!

When Ben and I got married two and half years ago, we had no problem doing a budget together. We read several books, and were able to talk about finances and come to agreements easily.

I was fortunate to be debt free, but only because I had sold a home, been fortunate to make a great profit, and paid off about $30,000 in debt (from credit cards and a car) just before we got engaged. At the time we got married, our debt was about $50,000 plus our house. That came from Ben’s student loans, credit card debt, and car. The car “debt” was actually a lease, but we planned to purchase the car at the end of the lease with all cash, so we treated the total buy out amount as a debt. Clearly, Ben and I were both in need of a total money makeover, but we got to that realization gradually.

We waited until we said “I DO”, but we paid off the credit card balance as soon as we were married with cash I had from the sale of my house. That left us with $45,000 in a consolidation loan, student loans, and the car. We both agreed we eventually wanted to be debt free, and started with the car “debt”. Since paying off the credit card balance we have NEVER carried a balance on a credit card farther than the next pay day. We BOTH learned how easily that got out of hand during our single days and promised one another, before we got married, that, as a couple, it was not going to happen again.

A few months after we were married, my husband read one of your books. He told me about it, and my response was that I was glad he was “gung ho” about getting rid of the debt, but I wasn’t ready to reduce our savings (I think we had maybe $15,000 cash and I did not want to stop contributing to retirement-- I was convinced it would be giving up free money since I had a matching contribution at my job).

Then two summers ago, while driving in Washington and Oregon, Ben brought your podcasts along for the long car ride, and- of course- got me hooked on your plan just as he was. All the sudden, our financial decisions became even easier as we considered “What would Dave do?”. Giving up a little of the extras was easy because of the success stories we read in The Total Money Makeover and on your show.

Our debt reduction was doable, so we didn’t feel we needed to be at the “beans and rice, rice and beans” level. We were serious, and committed, though. We got just a little stricter on our budget, and started holding each other accountable for larger purchases. I learned how much I tend to spend on gifts, so we planned our Christmas expenses and baby shower budget ahead of time. A quick call home would help decide-- “should I get a new microwave because I want one and see one I like at Costco? No, honey, ours works just fine” OR “Sure, we do have enough money for it and that sounds like an excellent deal for clothes you need!” We based our budget on having two pay days a month (we’re both on the same biweekly pay schedule), and as if Ben might not get any bonus money. We threw all of Ben’s bonuses at the debt, we used our tax refunds towards debt, and we used a good portion of those two “extra” pay checks in the 26 pay periods schedule toward debt. Since we’d done our budget without depending on those things, we barely noticed!

I remember one day when I got tired of looking at the smaller student loan of about $7,000, and said, honey, I think we should just use some of our savings and pay that off. I have never had a rush as exciting and refreshing as checking the balances on the students loans and seeing that one gone!

Meanwhile, we found out we are infertile. Now, four years ago, I wouldn’t have batted an eye at choosing to try IVF even though it would cause $12,000 or more in debt and might not even work. I also wouldn’t have considered it a bad idea to just charge the expensive tests Ben needed that weren’t covered by insurance. It just so happens though, that we’d already caught the “Dave Wave” so we did think twice. We paid for all the needed tests in cash, and if we couldn’t afford it, we waited until we could. We prayed about what we should do, and we had total peace when we decided adoption was a better option for us. We couldn’t imagine what it would be like to either become parents with a huge new debt like that, or how awful it would feel if we’d tried IVF, it was unsuccessful, and we’d still have to pay on a loan for it! It didn’t fit for us, especially in light of our Total Money Makeover!

I work as a claims representative for Social Security. I can not express how horrible it is to take claims from hard working people who suddenly find themselves too sick to work, but so deep in debt that they will loose their house. No emergency fund, they just bought a brand new car- with a loan- a year before so they will loose that too, and they are not sure how they will feed their family since they lost their job. No disability insurance- or somehow they don’t qualify, their long time job let them go at a drop of a hat when they mentioned their illness or missed too many days for doctors appointments, and now their Social Security decision will take a good 5 or 6 months.

You know what else is horrible? When a 62 year old comes in wanting to retire and realizes there is no way they can afford to live on Social Security alone-- they have 15 years left on their mortgage, no pension, barely any savings, and their spouse just died and left them nothing except one income instead of what used to be two. They can’t even afford their mortgage anymore.

I share that because my work helps me see the reality that people face on a regular basis. Not one of those suddenly disabled people thought they’d be disabled even three months before it happened. And as for those people who want to retire, I betcha in hindsight, they aren’t thinking all those debts were good decisions. You know what I love, though? Taking claims from people who are facing disability or ready to retire and won’t even need their Social Security check. They’re financially ready for whatever happens. These are the happiest, most relaxed people I meet. People who have lived like no one else and now can live like no one else!

Ben was told he was going to be let go effective January 1st. What a horrible crisis that could have been a few years ago. But not for us in the beginning of 2008! We were close to debt free, had been fortunate to see increases in both of our salaries since we got married, and just had one little $70 monthly minimum payment for the last student loan. We’d already purchased the car, and of course we had our baby step 1 $1000 emergency fund in place. We glanced at our budget, saw living on my salary alone was going to be no problem at all, and didn’t miss a beat. Once he got the news, and while he was still working, we just diverted our debt snowball money to savings in case we needed it for living expenses while he was looking for a new job.

Of course, Ben got a new, better job and ended up without a single day unemployed. And I got transferred to a new office doing the same job I was doing, but in a location I am more excited about. We were approved for adoption, but needed to wait until the next round of classes.

Well, here we are, ages 35 and 38, debt free except our house. We’ll have our baby step 3 of saving 4 months of expenses done in less than 4 months! Our adoption classes begin in March, and we are confident we’ll be able to afford the adoption fees when it comes time for us to bring home a baby to our “forever family”. We’ve enjoyed being able to give just a little more to ministries. Our house is on the market, we’ve been able to pay cash for all the expenses of getting it ready, and we’re looking for a new house that will be a better commute for BOTH of us. We are committed not to place an offer on any house without ours being under contract, and we’ve got a much bigger allowance for our next house than I ever imagined possible. It will be no problem to keep on your plan with that new mortgage, because it will, after all, be our only debt. And we won’t be buying more house than we can afford. And no worries, Dave, we can’t wait to get it paid off long before our kids reach college age!

Regarding Marriage and Money: We’ve always gotten along when discussing finances, but gosh. It did amazing things for our marriage as we repeatedly got to look at one another, realize we just met a goal of paying something off, give a high five, and say “Go Greenwalds!” in unison! I am so proud of my husband for leading us to this point! We became debt free just before Valentine’s Day. The love I felt for my husband at that nice restaurant we could totally afford is more amazing and greater than the love I felt for my husband on our wedding day.

What was the hardest part? Letting go of the comfort and safety net of having savings and contributing to our retirement.

What was the easiest part? Sending that last payment to Sallie Mae! Whew, what fun!!!!!

What was the most surprising? How easy it was to rearrange our budget and come up with so much more money.... boy, were we wasting money on needless things! And we don’t miss those things at all now. It is actually fun to be at a store, tempted by something I see, and be able to say: “nope, don’t need that, I’d rather that $25 be in our emergency fund!”

Thanks for your message, Dave. We love your books and your show. Your teaching has made a huge difference to us, our marriage, and our family. We’ve started on an entirely new path for us and our future children, and we’re skipping along on it!

Jennifer and Ben Greenwald, Atlanta, GA

get the podcasts, order a book, or read more about Dave Ramsey at www.daveramsey.com